THE SKINNY ON BEING SKINNY

I’ve learnt a great deal about health and fitness the hard way after gaining the freshmen 15, not only in freshman year but the three (3) consecutive years that followed.

Dozens of cleanses, fad diets, binges, green smoothies, and spin classes have lead me to where I am today; happy as heck with considerably less arm cellulite than ever before.

So I am going to share some tricks of the trade that I follow on the daily that have lead me to reach this point in my life:

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Fitness:

Opt for a living arrangement in your city’s ghetto – This will increase the chances of the elevator being out of service for weeks on end! Forcing you to take the stairs every damn day!!! Even when you are lugging home your heavy groceries (8 baguettes, and 2 tubs of ice-cream aren’t as light as they may look)

All the money you will be saving by living in your city’s slums can be put towards improving your lifestyle by taking part in FITNESS CLASSES!!

Working out with a group of people you don’t know is a really great way to experience an anxiety attack/effective workout. If you’re anything like me, being in a room with your fit, confident peers while you’re in workout clothes 2 sizes too small, with unshaved legs, and cellulite where cellulite shouldn’t be will naturally cause your heart rate to go up so fast jumping jacks won’t even be required!! Once you start doing the actual exercises your body will already be working twice as hard giving you some real bang for your buck (lets face it those classes aren’t cheap)

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Eating:

Don’t eat when you are NOT hungry – Sometimes we get bored, stressed, sad, happy or any other emotion under the sun, and all we want to do is EAT! But the key is to hold back on eating until you are ACTUALLY hungry.

In these states of uncontrollable binging desires I try to fill my stomach with calorie free options. I like to pound back as many diet cokes as it takes to feel so bloated that the thought of eating repulses me!

Another great tip is to find foods that are tasty AND healthy!

Gummy vitamins are my favorite go to when I’m craving something sweet, but want to stay on track. They are great because they taste like candy but in fact are filled with all kinds of health benefits including Glucose syrup, sucrose, gelatin, and ascorbic acid!!

 

If you thought those tips were good then you’re in for a real treat because there is a lot more where that came from. I’ll be posting some more tips as the dreaded bikini season approaches 🙂

Now go eat a donut and get on with your day ❤

(If you’re actually trying to get into a healthy lifestyle don’t follow any of these tips – actually maybe take a workout class – that one was actually good)

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