The worst financial crisis YET

My finances are fucking me over left, right and centre. I am now left with no other option other than to write a self-deprecating blog post about it!

I just need to start out by saying that despite the unfortunate situation I’ve found myself in, I am in fact very good at managing my finances and being financially independent, but lets get to the juicy stuff.

It all started approximately three weeks ago when I decided to open a bank account here in Paris, to avoid the obnoxiously high fees I kept being charged whenever I withdrew cash.

My new bank told me that my debit card was ready to be picked up, so I wired ALL my funds from my Canadian account to my new Paris account.

Unfortunately there had been a typo on some information, which resulted in the bank refusing to give me my new card.

Coincidently they opted not to return any of my calls, emails, voicemails, and had nobody available to assist me all 3 times that I physically went into the bank.

During this time, I had no funds to spend because all my Canadian funds were sitting in my new French bank account, that I was unable to access because the debit card could not be issued. Luckily I was still able to keep my head above water because God created the beautiful piece of plastic commonly known as a VISA card.

I went from comfortably treading water, to drowning in the deep end with no lifeguard in sight in the span of one day, when a credit machine refused my payment and flashed the straight up insulting words “card declined: insufficient funds” after I tried to pay for my monthly metro card.

MY VISA HAD BEEN MAXED OUT! And I had no way to pay it off because I had no money in my Canadian account!! And still no access to my Paris account!

So there I was in the metro station, with places to be, people to see, and croissants to purchase but no FUNDS to do any of it!!

I had to sneak onto the buses, and crawl under the metro barriers for an entire two days because I couldn’t afford to pay for a ticket!!

Things hit an all time low a few days ago when I found myself cooped up in my room with no food, no money to buy groceries, no metro pass to go anywhere, and no wifi (couldn’t pay off my wifi bill).

I decided that life had to go on, so I walked my poor sorry ass down to Zara and returned a t-shirt and a body suit that I had purchased (and worn) a few days ago so I could have some extra spending money.

For the past week I have been living off my body suit money. Please pray for me during the most serious financial crises recorded in history.

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